A beautiful word or thought that is not accompanied by corresponding acts is like a bright flower that bears no fruit. It would not produce any effect. ~The Buddha

Friday, January 7, 2011


I was going to write on a completely different topic today and then I opened my email.  

One of the blogs I read everyday is written by Therese Borchard, called Beyond Blue, which is primarily about her spiritual journey through mental health.  Now and again, she quotes an author, and today it was from the book, "We:  Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love"  by Robert A. Johnson, and how he distinguishes human love, or what I will take one step further, and call "mature" love.  He describes it as the precious, committed love that is with us every day, the "stirring-the-oatmeal" love.  Johnson writes:

"Stirring oatmeal is a humble act--not exciting or thrilling. But it symbolizes a relatedness that brings love down to earth. It represents a willingness to share ordinary human life, to find meaning in the simple, unromantic tasks: earning a living, living within a budget, putting out the garbage, feeding the baby in the middle of the night. To "stir the oatmeal" means to find the relatedness, the value, even the beauty, in simple and ordinary things, not to eternally demand a cosmic drama, an entertainment, or an extraordinary intensity in everything."

Sprinkle the oatmeal with respect, and trust, and there's a relationship for the long haul.  I know it's far too early to be borrowing from the work of other people, but I couldn't have said this better.  Sure, the rush of romantic love or a new relationship is a thrill, but in order to go the distance, you've got to be able to stir the oatmeal, and that suits me perfectly.  

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